News: Marilyn, my stepmom has passed away.

It was a peaceful but unexpected death. She passed on in her sleep of a heart attack. I've come from Fiji to Victoria, Canada to be with my family and my father for the ceremony. I will miss her presence in my life.

Use this moment, this brief space in your usual daily thoughts to reflect.

Reflect not on loss but instead think on those you care for.

Treasure them in your every breath because we do not know how long we are to be in this lifetime.

______________________________________________________

Life as we
Find it, death too

- Ta-Hui Tsung-Kao.

Diet & Dharma

Just this morning, I tasted the first mango to be harvested from my tree. The depth and complexity of flavour was astounding. I truly hope I can continue to savor my food each time with such relish.

I have decided recently to attempt a vegan diet once more. My conscious has been disturbed each time I think on the conditions in which most dairy cows exist. And if I am able to abstain from meat and eggs, than why not dairy? Besides, I truly think there is no better place on this earth for fresh organic produce than Fiji. The exception I will make to this diet is while eating as a guest in another’s home (it would be near impossible to avoid milk in an Indo-Fijian home).

I have been walking besides a path I was too cowardly to step upon. A path where I must hold myself to a higher standard of behavior.

I have felt for sometime that there have been actions in my life, which were less than appropriate: the treatment of those around me, my level of compassion and respect regarding others’ commitments, my diet. In the past, I found some way of consoling myself and disregarded my violation of certain ideas that I hold to be true. If I lowered my standards of expectation for myself, they were easier to attain without failure. But I want to be worthy of the respect I am given, even if it means failure.

The truth I have perceived lately is that being a noble person does not mean denying emotion or contrary thoughts. I do not have to defy who I am to walk this path, I only need to find the benefit in taking the other more challenging action.

The first step in this journey is coming to terms with who I am, not in a struggle to better myself, but to consider my Self a friend. I need to see my Self as I would someone I care for – I would never disregard someone because of their flaws but accept them for everything they are, unconditionally. So why should I not extend the same attitude to myself?

Fun with Hindi - Tati & Tita

In my learning Fijian Hindi, I have made one terribly notable mistake thus far. And I thought I might share it so should you ever come to Fiji you will not make the same mistake.

I was over a neighbor's house playing with her young daughter of about a year when suddenly the child grabs her diaper and begins to shout "Tati, tati!" I had not heard this word before and asked her mother what it meant and she said it translated to (politely put) poop. I laughed and said that perhaps she needed to change her diaper. The next day at the Senior Centre, the staff and I were having lunch and my friend (and counterpart) offered me some of her curry to taste. It was delicious but spicy and so I said to her, "khana bahut sawaad, bahut tati." Yes, I had said "tati" instead of "tita." Meaning - instead of saying that her food was delicious and spicy, I had said it was delicious and shitty. She laughed and still reminds me of it every time we sit down to eat and she offers me food.

Recipe: Maharishtrian Eggplant

I am hoping to post recipes that I discover here in Fiji to give each of you back home a little taste (literally) of my life here.

I've included the recipe as an image so you can just copy and paste it.

Eat, enjoy and think of palm trees!

Compassionate Intent Gone Awry

And then there was the time I got stung by a hive of wasps while trying to save three drowning kittens…

I came home in the middle of a tropical downpour to the sound of mewling kittens. I searched the house unsuccessfully, until I came upon a window near my bedroom. Right outside this window is a partially finished cinderblock enclosure that was meant to become a bathroom and there in the corner, are three newborn kittens slowly drowning in a puddle. At first, I think – that their mother has abandoned them and I should go and save them. Then, I think that perhaps I just can't see her. Then, I call another PCV to get a second opinion. He thinks they are probably abandoned. Compassion gives me little choice. I go, barefoot, back out into the rain and try to climb into the "window" almost successfully until a stabbing pain blossoms in my arm. At this point I cry out and see the mother cat slink out from inside her cozy barrel. I proceed to get stung a number of times all over my body as I desperately try to get away from the place and into the house. Now, as I am sitting in bed, thanking the gods I had tasty leftovers for dinner, and writing this entry - I understand that those kittens will more than likely not last the night but I also know that it is not realistically within my power to do anything about it Part of me searches for the larger message in this event but I am not seeing it, not yet.

Photos: Pre-Service Training

PC/Fiji: Pre-Service Training

Ideas for Care Packages

Personal Supplies

Letters

Recent Pictures of Friends & Family (Laminated if possible)

Nalgene Containers, 32 oz. (Be sure to fill them with something)

Magazines - Tricycle, Shambala Sun, Dharma Life, Martha Stewart, Good Things, anything Photography/Art oriented

Nice Cotton Bed Sheets & Pillowcases

Good Absorbent Towels

Games & Puzzles


Books (I am missing these the most)

Anything Buddhist/Zen - Examples: Pema Chondron, Thich Nhat Hahn, S. Suzuki

Anything UU or inter-faith related

Educational - Alternative Classrooms, Learner-based technique, Interactive Games

Health/Community Development - Nutrition, Gardening, Elder Care, Simple Crafts

Fantasy & Fiction - Harry Potter, Laurel K Hamilton, Sean Russell (Bodahist series), Dune


Consumables

Dr. Bronners Soap (Tea tree, Lavender)

Anything from LUSH

E-Z Fill Ziplock Bags 1.5 & 2 Gallon Sizes

Compilation Music CDs

New Release CDs (For ideas check out MySpace music section)

New Release DVDs

Extra Rechargable Batteries

Incense (Favorites: Cedarwood, Traditional Zen, Tibetan Rope)

Silica Gel


Non-Perishable Food Items (Vegetarian)

Anything vegetarian from Trader Joe's will earn my undying love

Spices: Mixes are great. Italian, Mexican, American, Japanese, Trader Joe's Pumpkin Pie Mix

Tea - Favored brands are Yogi Teas (Cocoa Spice, Simply Green, Sweet Thai) and Tazo

Powdered Soymilk

Vegan Chocolate, Dark (in packages that will not leak because it will melt)

Dried Soup Mixes

Dried Seaweed: Wakame, Hijiki

Dried Fruit in Ziplock Bags

Miso Paste

Dried Ravoli (No meat please)

Poem: City Limits by A.R. Ammons

When you consider the radiance, that it does not withhold
itself but pours its abundance without selection into every
nook and cranny not overhung or hidden; when you consider

that birds' bones make no awful noise against the light but
lie low in the light as in a high testimony; when you consider
the radiance, that it will look into the guiltiest

swervings of the weaving heart and bear itself upon them,
not flinching into disguise or darkening; when you consider
the abundance of such resource as illuminates the glow-blue

bodies and gold-skeined wings of flies swarming the dumped
guts of a natural slaughter or the coil of shit and in no
way winces from its storms of generosity; when you consider

that air or vacuum, snow or shale, squid or wolf, rose or lichen,
each is accepted into as much light as it will take, then
the heart moves roomier, the man stands and looks about, the

leaf does not increase itself above the grass, and the dark
work of the deepest cells is of a tune with May bushes
and fear lit by the breadth of such calmly turns to praise.

Connected

I am once again a part of the digital world.

I also have acquired Skype. I have enough bandwidth to be able to hold a conversation over the internet. This means if you get Skype too, we can sit and talk using our computers for free. So, all of you go get Skype. My username is the same as my email address, or you can search for me via my email. I hope to chat with all of you soon.

Unitarian Universalism: Is UU class-oriented?

Article at uuworld.org - "Not My Father's Religion"